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Stop Letting Others Control You

Writer's picture: Adete DahiyaAdete Dahiya

Updated: Jan 23


Have you ever met someone who always seems to bring you down?

Someone who cannot handle any good news associated with you?

Who is always complaining, gossiping, or being negative?


This category of people is known as energy vampires.


Now, what exactly do I mean when I say an energy vampire?

Are they similar to the ones from Twilight or TVD? 😆


The answer is yes and no.


While they do share some traits with fictional vampires such as hiding in shadows, manipulation ,and mind control, they don’t get burned in sunlight or shine like diamonds.


Energy vampires have a special place in psychology — they are people who simply drain your energy. They are often characterized as negative, pessimistic, and self-centered.


Apart from that they are often skilled at emotional manipulation and can be controlling in nature. They may use guilt, shame, or fear to get what they want. Gaslighting is also something that they can use to make you doubt yourself and your reality.


Now, such people are very easy to spot if you like to observe them.


Energy vampires can be very draining to be around. They can make you feel stressed, anxious, and depressed all at the same time.



Here are a few examples of energy vampires:


🧛🏻‍♀️ The complainer: This person is always complaining about something. They might complain about their job, their boss, their family, or the weather.


🧛🏻‍♀️ The gossiper: This person loves to talk about other people's business. They might gossip about your friends, family, or coworkers.


🧛🏻‍♀️ The drama queen: This person loves to create drama. They might start arguments, spread rumors, or makeup stories just to escalate a bad situation.


🧛🏻‍♀️ The victim players: This person always plays the victim. They might blame others for their problems or make excuses for their failures.


🧛🏻‍♀️ The control freak: This person wants to control everything. They might even try to micromanage you or tell you what to do.


🧛🏻‍♀️ The energy thief: Lastly, we have the energy thief who is always trying to get your attention. They might interrupt you, talk over you, or monopolize conversations.


Since there are so many categories, it also becomes easier for them to camouflage themselves in the crowd, and you might not even realize it when one peeked into your life.


And that is exactly why I thought to write this edition to give you a clear guide to avoid energy-draining vampires from your proximity.


Here are 7 ways to detox from energy vampires:

 

➡️ Set boundaries: Let such people know that their behavior is not acceptable. Set crystal clear boundaries around them. I will be discussing more on this in upcoming editions, so stay tuned for future editions.


➡️Limit your time with them: Energy vampires tend to drain your energy, leaving you feeling emotionally and mentally exhausted. To protect yourself, keep interactions short and purposeful. For example, if you’re at work, keep conversations focused on tasks and avoid getting pulled into negative or unnecessary discussions.


➡️Find a support system: Having a support system helps you cope with the stress that such people can cause. Talk to friends, family, or even a therapist who understands what you’re going through. They can offer advice, reassurance, and sometimes just a safe space to vent. A solid support network can help you recharge and remind you of the positive people in your life.


➡️Focus on positive energy: Actively fill your life with uplifting people, activities, and places. Engage in hobbies that bring you joy, listen to music that makes you feel good, or go to places that inspire you. These positive influences can help counteract any negativity you absorb from the energy vampire, giving you a well-rounded and fulfilling life.


➡️Develop self-care strategies: Practicing self-care is key to maintaining emotional strength and resilience. This means, focusing on sleeping well, eating balanced meals, and getting regular exercise. These simple habits can help build your mental and physical stamina, so you’re less affected by negativity and better equipped to handle stressful situations.


➡️Practice self-compassion: It’s easy to feel guilty or blame yourself for the energy vampire’s actions, but remember that their behavior isn’t your fault. Being kind to yourself can help reduce any self-blame and boost your energy at the same time.


➡️Just sayNo: Saying no can feel difficult, especially with someone who doesn’t respect boundaries. But it is super essential for your self-protection. Start by saying no to smaller requests, then build up to bigger ones if needed. Use polite but firm language, like “I’m sorry, but I can’t help with that right now,” to make your stance clear.


You don't have to tolerate energy vampires and damage your mental psyche.

You too deserve to have healthy and be in positive relationships.


That’s why if you are facing such a situation, I will highly suggest you to take these steps to protect yourself so that you can create a more positive and fulfilling life.


Btw, do you have any particular method to deal with energy vampires?

Comment and share it with me, maybe I can cover it in my upcoming editions.

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