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You Don't Need These Emotional Burdens

Writer's picture: Adete DahiyaAdete Dahiya

Ever feel like you're carrying 500kgs of negativity on your shoulders? Or resentment from that relationship that went south? Or it can even be guilt for an incident beyond your control?

 

Well, you're not alone. We all carry emotional baggage such as resentment for lost jobs, regret for unsaid words, and fear of judgment for those silly tweets from 2013. Honestly, that list can go on and on. 📃

 

But here's something that you should know: holding onto this baggage only weighs YOU down.

 

While all individuals irrespective of their gender can experience emotional struggles, there is a particular burden placed on men when it comes to expressing and processing their feelings. Since childhood, boys have been told ‘’Boys don’t cry’’ or have heard Bollywood dialogues like ‘’Mard ko dard nahi hota’’. This kind of messaging however creates a culture of emotional suppression that haunts boys till the later part of life.

 

Same with girls. All of us girls (including me) have been preconditioned with certain notions that build up excess emotional baggage as we grow. Now, it might not be the same for all, but there are some common culprits to look out for.

 

Let's unpack some of those:

 

➡️ The "Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda" Blues: Dwelling on the past, replaying those "what ifs," scenarios, and clinging to resentment can easily keep you stuck.

 

➡️ Guilt Trip Anyone? Carrying guilt for other people's mistakes steals your peace too sometimes. You can't control their choices, so focus on what you can.

 

➡️ Society's Should-Do List: It’s high time you skip those unrealistic expectations! You don't owe anyone a picture-perfect life. Seriously, I mean it. You owe nothing to the society.

 

➡️ The Fear of Judgment: This monster thrives on secrecy and shame. Remember the cult classic song - Kuch to log kahenge, logo ka kaam hai kehna. That’s what happens in the case of judgment.

 

➡️ Relationship Residue: Holding onto anger from past relationships only hurts you. Forgive, don't forget, and learn from the experience.

 

Want to lighten your load? Here are my suggestions:

 

  • Practice gratitude: Focus on the good in your life, big and small. Shift your perspective and watch your joy grow.

     

  • Forgive yourself and others: Holding onto grudges hurts you more than anyone else. Let go and find peace.

     

  • Embrace self-compassion: Be kind to yourself, just like you would be to a friend. Mistakes happen, learn from them and move on.

     

  • Seek support: Talk to a therapist if needed, join a support group, or confide in a trusted friend. Sharing your burdens can be a game-changer.

     

  • Focus on the present: Mindfulness techniques can help you stay grounded and appreciate the here and now.

     

As we conclude, here are some parting words I want you to take away.

 

“Letting go isn't about erasing the past; it's about creating space for a brighter future. So, ditch the drama, release that excess baggage, and step into a lighter, happier YOU!”

 

By the way, I am curious, which emotional burden are you ditching today? Share with me below.

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